Of course we get angry and feel resentful when we are treated poorly! That’s a normal reaction. We are angry because someone intentionally hurt us. Shame on them, not on us!

Do psy’s intentionally get the client angry to see how they react in order to diagnose them or as some strange therapeutic approach?

I didn’t stick around long enough to find out, lol. Why would I go back to talk to someone callous and mean? I was hoping for a caring person to help me. I wanted the psy to speak to me with compassion, even if calling me out on my own bad behavior. IMHO, that’s the only way to ever get anywhere in a confrontation with anyone about anything. If you nastily put them on the defensive, they are going to get indignant and lash out at you.

There are some people who can’t stand criticism no matter how you approach it. They will deny and lash out over their own abusive behavior.

I was always open to my own wrong doings and wanted to improve. I went to therapy to try to learn how to get along in these difficult relationships.

On my own, I’ve come up with the only coping skill to just avoid getting into it with toxic people, finding nicer people, doing enjoyable, helpful things, and trying to mind my own big mouth.

I must have seen over a dozen different therapists over the past 20 years now until I finally gave up. In all fairness, only a couple said mean, angering comments. Most were open, kind, somewhat sympathetic but I found them not very effective for me. That’s on me, probably my own trust issues never let me really feel comfortable. Plus, I wanted to change the other person, and that certainly was never going to happen, lol. I know it had to be me to change myself. That’s still a challenge.