I feel what you're going through. I'm 37, no sex, barest amount of intimacy. And now, the word "incel" is going to make it worse to find someone interested in me who won't run away the second I'm found out.

As for dating, I am LITERALLY incapable of "picking up non-verbal cues." I'm sorry, I'm that stupid but I have to be told these things.

I don't want people to say sex isn't a big deal. If it isn't, why are there so many jokes about people who haven't done it yet.

I'm sorry, I wish I could give some sage advice to you OP. All I can do is say I know what you're going through and hope it gets better for you.