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One thing I could add is your husband is more than likely frustrated FOR you. He hates to see your pain, and that frustration sets his mind into a loop where he is frustrated with life himself, knows its not your fault, but has to fight to remember that.
We also hurt those we love, knowing the will more than likely forgive us.
Him holding back saying I love you might be him externalizing his internal fight. He loves you, but hates the situation. He might be stuck in that vicious cycle himself.
Idk. I throw that out there, trying to think positive. You likewise are fighting a mental fight yourself, very conscious of your physical health and the impact it is having on your and his life. That no doubt frustrates you, probably leads to feelings of inadequacy and as though you are letting him down and everything is your fault. Reality is life happens. You both know that. Being a carer (him) is hard as he sees your pain and wants recovery for you as much as him. You feel a failure because you want recovery for you and him. It will also mean you'll be very aware of any negative ques you hear, even if said unintentionally or intentionally but not directed at you.
Hold onto hope. Don't let this break you. Who knows what life will look like in 6 months from now. Thank him. Tell him you're trying your best and need him, but also need his continued support, reassurance and love.
What youre going through is so hard. Thank you for reaching out. : Love.
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Belly buttons. To be an Innie or an Outtie.
THAT is the question
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