My father died when I was 12. It was shocking because I didn’t know he was that ill until they told me he died. They didn’t even tell me he was dying and give me the opportunity to say good bye! I was numb about his death and had no tears at his funeral or there ever after. I loved him. I certainly felt bad that he died. I don’t know why I had that cold reaction except for the fact it was so shocking because the truth was kept from me and it made me feel that I didn’t matter to him or to my family.

Then my grandparents and great aunt and uncle died when I was older. I loved them all and was very close with them all. Again, no tears for them ever, but was sad they passed and have fondly remembered them.

It’s not that I am without emotion. I have actually been diagnosed with emotional dysregulation disorder. I have cried a river over difficult relationships with people who are still living... my husband mostly.

I think about my dear departed very often and imagine they are talking to me and helping me through difficult situations with the living. Lol

There is another thread going on here now about someone who made a very callous remark about not caring about someone dying. Check it out. You may have touched on something where a person does feel love and loss but doesn’t express the sadness.

In your case, it might have to do with that you feel your great aunt was elderly and led a full life. I know that’s how I felt when my grandparents and their generation passed. My father was only 44, so that was a life taken too soon compared to those who lived long.

I don’t think you have cause for concern regarding your reaction IMHO.