yes i am seeing the doctor after school. thanks for your advice. yes i do have a home-carer for my mother even though technically i don't qualify for one so we had to go private and not through the NHS. she isn't that bad but she is just a bit of a risk since my sister's death.
Both my psychiatrist and I decided against continuing counselling/CBT/psychoanalysis. i am a compulsive liar so it really just does not help. i am schizoid/narcissist so counselling is very unlikely to help. sorry, i just felt like ranting, it is fine really.