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Old Nov 29, 2019, 12:20 PM
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Member Since: Oct 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 10,799
Quote:
Originally Posted by BethRags View Post
There is a woman with whom I've been very close friends for half a century (basically, all of our lives). She's a terrific mom and has two adult children, just like I do. I've always thought of her as someone with high ethics and decent morals. I've always respected her.

Last week my friend invited me to join a Facebook group she moderates. I agreed. It's a private group, and as soon as my request to join was accepted I found out that the group is an "adults only" group. Erotica that (in my opinion) is demeaning to both women and men. Encouraging inappropriately invasive "games" (example: "Truth: would you rather...or..." and the answers are about certain sexual acts). So, you get the idea.

I find the group totally offensive, ignorant, and revolting. On top of that it's very triggering for me.

I've quietly stopped participating in the group (after 1 upsetting day of trying to fake my interest so as not to hurt my friend's feelings).

I know she's going to ask me why I'm not posting there. I don't know what the heck to say. The word "triggering" wouldn't mean anything to her. If I tell her that I find the group unappealing she's going to be offended. But I definitely do not want to be a part of the group. I don't even want my name associated with it. In addition, the group's content is so superficial and depressing to me.

Does anybody have ideas for a gentle, but clear, way to tell my friend that I'm not interested in her group? (I'll avoid telling her that I'm surprised and saddened that she even participates in such a creepy group.)
Have you thought about explaining I'm sorry but this is not the right group for me for reason I can not explain I do value out friendship and I want to thank you for inviting me.
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Thanks for this!
*Beth*, Discombobulated