Paranoia~It's doing a good job of putting a strain on my relationships. I "think" you are being deliberately uncaring or hurtful to me, so I react and be insensitive, cold, or harsh to you to "get you back", give you "your due" because
"you started it" by torturing me! What do you expect when you poke a stick at a sick dog that's down!!! (Of course all the evidence shows me that people are NOT doing this to me. I have "checked" so many times, and each and every time I found out I really was just being paranoid.) *sigh* It takes a while for me to see clearly after I think you deliberately hurt me. Only after I react badly and settle down can I see clearly that hey, I can see why you did that, it makes sense and had nothing to do with me at all. Then I cringe because I have to go through my round of heartful but embarassing apologies. I am getting counseling and seeing a PsychPA for this, but all the meds I've tried or am on have helped me with other things, but they don't touch the thing I need help with most. Probably switching to Lithium next week.