rechu - I have been in your shoes living abroad and learned quickly who I could vent/turn to for emotional support, and who I couldn't, based on how people reacted when I shared information with them. Sounds like you've learned now, who is in your corner emotionally, and who isn't.

People who are quick to invalidate your feelings, when they say "oh, I"m sure it will turn out fine!" are the type I refer to as "one-siders." The one-siders will no doubt vent to you about their problems b/c they know you'll emotionally support them. But god forbid you expect the same emotional support and respect of your feelings from them -- that is not something they are interested in doing. So, they're "one-siders." One-sided type relationships. Put those people in your acquaintance category. And keep them there.

People who understand your situation, will simply validate your feelings and respect your feelings.

People who truly empathize with you, won't dismiss your feelings with phrases such as "sorry you are going through this," or "I hope things get better for you." Those phrases make me cringe when I hear/read them, because it's the person's way of telling you that you sharing negative feelings about a situation makes them uncomfortable. Very much an example of toxic positivity.

There is ZERO wrong with expressing negative emotion. Anyone who tells you otherwise, is wrong. Guess what. People are 3-dimensional and our negative emotions are actually HELPFUL to us. I posted a thread here about how negative emotions help us, and why toxic positivity is a horrible thing.

The best way to confront people who spew toxic positivity at you -- if you want to avoid arguing with them -- is unfortunately to change subjects. I hate advising that, b/c it's advising you to put your own feelings aside to take care of someone else's feelings. I don't think you should be a doormat so if you want to set a boundary with them, respond to the next toxic positive comment with this boundary, "I understand that you can't see the full scope of the situation because you don't live here, but I do live here, and it is my reality. I'm sharing this information with you because I'm going through (this is the boundary part) a really stressful period in my life with my job loss, and the situation with this country, and I could use some emotional support (here is where you are asking them to respect your boundary and making a request to them)." If they are truly empathetic , they will respond with validation of your feelings and give you emotional support. If they respond by acting defensive, put them in the one-sider category and understand that they are probably not someone to go to for emotional support again.