I am in the same boat: Just started Lithium last night - 1st try at it ever, I was so paranoid to take the 1st pill, yet anxious for something to regulate my shifting moods - I call yo-yo me - Up like a rocket and down like a ton of bricks into darkness - so many highs and lows, sometimes just want to chop my head off.*temporary relief thoughts"-------having Bipolar......

.I use to have no problem taking a street drug!!~~ why do I have this 'phobia' 'of taking something prescribed? My Dr thinks I am strange in that sense. I suppose that is part and parcel with the BIPOLAR mania doing things that would be considered dangerous to others, yet being nauty is a thrill to me. Not thinking of the consequences of taking illegal substances, YET PARANOID as hell about taking something prescribed by a profession in the medical field. I freak and wonder about the side effects. ??????

So far Lithium makes me feel DUMB. Hard to find words to describe like I am a 5th grader just learning to fly into NORMAL land. Yes, I am eager to be 'normal' calm, level headed. Stable moods.......find joy in the simple things in life, and get back to finding interest in things I use to enjoy doing, like Art for i.e. painting. Very tierd yet anxious, a bit conveluted.