No, he probably just didn't want his mother mixed up in the relationship. Nothing you could do about that once she stopped by and got herself involved!? Unless, you'd known enough at the time not too mention it? But, how could you have possibly known that much back then? Interesting, maybe, that you loved him for him -- whatever that means? -- and not what needs he could fill for you?

I stopped by this thread (hope it's OK, folks, I don't have BPD though I did and probably still do have PD issues of some sort, diagnosed PDNOS about 10 years ago) because I saw your posting in another forum. For whatever it's worth and whatever that means, I like you for you. You seem honest -- and thus trustworthy, from my standpoint. You've been posting on PC a lot of years and I think I kinda get your struggles. Not the one with your H, though. My relationship with my late H was much different. Oh, well, people are different.