Wow. I think it is good that you acknowledge your feelings and understand why you have them. I believe knowing why we have certain impulses or feelings weakens their power over us.

I am glad that I have been gaining this insight.

I do think it's odd that your psychiatrist would flat out tell you what to do about a major life decision (could he have been joking or not literal?).

He was not joking and he was being literal. I believe he is genuinely concerned that such a stressful move would be destabilizing for me. That can certainly be a concern most doctors would have for me.

To me, it seems that the move could be wrong if your husband is the only person who wants it and you are being forced to go along with it. Is there any benefit for you in moving to Europe or will you be giving up everything you value to accommodate your husband? My husband believes that given my disability and the uncertainty about health coverage in the future, that living in Europe could be safer for us. My husband is a European. Our finances would provide more for us there than they do in our current state. 2020 may influence our next steps. As for friends and family, there would be little loss living in Europe. Culture shock is an issue, but one can also have culture shock moving within one's own country. Language skills would need to be improved, but we are not beginners in the language. Will you feel isolated and alone there or are you able to make new friends easily? Will there be other benefits such as increased household income?