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Old Dec 05, 2019, 04:34 PM
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LonesomeTonight LonesomeTonight is offline
Always in This Twilight
 
Member Since: Feb 2015
Location: US
Posts: 22,059
Quote:
Originally Posted by chihirochild View Post
I'm not sure I understand his approach either. I'm just so confused, and my head is so muddled that I can't think it through.

I could certainly use some validation from him--I can count on one hand the times he's said "good job" or "good work" to me in the last year and a half. He's plenty validating in the empathetic, "that sounds difficult" or, "I can see that you're struggling" kind of way, just not a big fan of verbally recognizing or praising me for working my *** off in therapy/life.

Maybe one day I can get to that place of embracing borderline traits... I just have so much damn shame about it :/

I'm not sure about his overall approach either.
I'd definitely struggle with the lack of validation. Just today, my T praised me for using some breathing techniques to get through a recent medical testing procedure and for my difference in perspective/approach (compared to usual) on the uncertainty waiting for the results. Though I'm also a "words of affirmation" person.


I have a few borderline traits, too, though my T said it's fairly common to have traits.
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Thanks for this!
chihirochild