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It's hard to have compassion for another person unless you walk in that other person's shoes.
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I have to say that I would probably handle the situation you faced with your room mate differently. If I was sitting down and eating something I prepared, I may have felt bad that the room mate came out and I had not prepared enough for her too. If I had been watching a movie and she shared that she knew the writer or director, I probably would have taken that as an opportunity to ask her questions. I may have said, "oh, how about I make you something to eat while you tell me all about these people". I am always interested in listening to another persons life voyage tbh. It sounds like this woman worked around a lot of very talented creative people. When it comes to that industry, one works around a lot of different kinds of creative people too and with that a lot of different kinds of personalities and temperments.
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You and I are very different people. Be careful with the assumptions you make about me. I spent the past 5 months
accommodating my roommate by feeding her meals without being financially reimbursed, even feeding her son whom she neglected and he's a teenager capable of feeding himself (pending his autism diagnosis, if he even has that, or if he's just messed up because of neglectful parenting). I did not move in to her house as Mary Poppins.
So, I've LOST money. That I need for myself. I clean her house, take care of her cat. Do snow shoveling, leaf raking. Moving forward, until I can move out, her sister agreed to lower my rent which I think is reasonable since my roommate continues to take meals from me (although she's clearly capable of ordering groceries or meals to be delivered to her if she didn't even have a roommate).
It sounds like you're telling me I lack compassion for my roommate. Are you?
I did not move in with my roommate to become her caregiver or her post-Hollywood personal assistant. I am under no obligations to cater to my roommate other than pay her rent for the room she's letting me rent. That does not make me an uncaring person.
Everyone deserves to feel safe with the people they live with.