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Old Dec 11, 2019, 03:00 PM
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divine1966 divine1966 is offline
Legendary Wise Elder
 
Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 23,183
Quote:
Originally Posted by Noname1987 View Post
My husband seems to think all men would be happy to see a woman at any point. He’s probably right, but I agree, that’s not someone else’s decision to make for them. Which I’ve told my husband. I’m ok dressing in a sexier manner, or even going braless sometimes. But I fully agree that it’s over the line to intentionally expose myself to someone. That’s just one of his ideas. He has also suggested having a couple of his buddies over and playing strip poker (which is not something we’ve EVER done) with the full intention of me losing on purpose. Like he wants friends he and I have know for 10-15 years to just see me naked. I’m like, “ how could I ever face them again after that?! These are LONG term friendships. How could we ever have a gathering where half the guys at the get together have seen me naked! And how can you be ok with your friends seeing your wife naked?!” He just says they’d be thrilled to see me and it would be fun. Like it’s no big deal. I really don’t think he’s imagining past the fantasy to the real world that happens afterwards. He’s just caught up in the fantasy and doesn’t play out the full scenario.

So it’s not only surprise showing, that’s just one idea he’s mentioned. What I don’t get is how he can be ok with his friends seeing his wife. Wouldn’t they think less of him (and me!) if he let them do that?! Not saying it’s his choice. But just for argument’s sake, I would think it would damage a guys ego if his friends all got to see his wife, right?!

Anyways, had to reschedule the counseling for tomorrow morning. Babysitter fell though. I’ll update everyone tomorrow. Thank you again for the support everyone!
No, your husband isn’t right about all men liking to see random women naked. So you are saying you believe that if my husband or father or brother knocked on some door and you opened it, they’d be happy to see you naked there? Why? That’s a strange thing to believe. Maybe all 15-year olds want to see every woman naked

I think it’s degrading to think of all men this way. I
think your husband projects his own ideas on other men.

I think if other men seeing you naked excites your husband, then no, it won’t damage his ego. That’s what he likes and I don’t believe he will stop liking. I am just surprised that after that many years you didn’t know that’s what he likes. Usually that stuff comes out rather early.

Good luck with therapy
Thanks for this!
*Beth*, Middlemarcher