My Support Forums - View Single Post - please give country or state & if u are being treated by what doctor

sarahsweets · Dec 12, 2019 at 12:52 PM

Hey @luvyrself I want to say I get it, I really do.

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Originally Posted by luvyrself

Yes, I agree that the best thing on the forum is when people accept us, understand us, and validate us. However, in my life, I want tips and information very much. Often the person is asking a specific question.

There are times that I wish more info was shared. And sometimes I will ask something like "if you are comfortable sharing xyz would you mind elaborating?" This allows that person to either decide to share, tell me know, ask for what they need, say its a rant or whatever. It keeps poster in control about their personal issues and I do think that is what's best. I have seen other people say they cant comment without more info, and I have seen people say they do not have specific advice but want the poster to know they read their post and understand.

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Often the person is asking a specific question. With psychiatric doctors that take insurance, and some private doctors offering 15 minute sessions once youre past intake, I think info from peers is VITAL. Bipolar is complex and yay, I have mixed episodes. Most of the therapists I have encountered over my 40 years with this just sit there. I have to press for goal setting over and over. Obviously I like structure and specific help as fast as I can get it. And I have learned more than from 40 years worth of doctors here.

But we are not professionals....

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I think its possible to validate the person just by giving a specific response--showing that you take them seriously, care about what happens to them, and intend in any way we can.

I agree 100%.

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So I think we can help in two ways: 1. by showing warmth and acceptance and 2. by answering questions in an effective way. Again, I think people can be helped a lot more when we know what we're dealing with. Im going to try to be as specific as possible when I start a thread asking for ideas.

No disrespect meant but I do not know if people responding necessarily need to know what they are "dealing with". I think a poster can get great support when they ask for what they need but its not always easy for someone to be that self aware. Sometimes I will ask if they want to vent or advice? Sometimes its neither, many times its no advice but support. All we can do is ask and not have expectations because people are in all sorts of places when they post.

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I dont think I should be ashamed of trying to help people by sharing all those years of experience that i got THE HARD WAY with very little support and almost NO information. Acceptance is important too, but I want people to tell me what has worked for them specifically or what they think will work for me.

I did not get the impression that anyone was trying to shame you. I have had 20 years butt deep in the psychiatric amusement park of life but I do not know if that makes me more or less qualified to share what I know. And what you or I know is often subjective.

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I just want people to get more information than I received and was starved for. It would have changed my life.

I hear you and I can see how heartfelt you are and that your intentions are good.