It does seem like your city is a REALLY toxic environment, @LundiHvalursson. I hope this doesn't offend you, I am so sorry if that's the case, I didn't mean it and I apologize in advance! I, too, like Your Mother and likethe wise and wonderful @Serpentine Leaf have already wisely and wonderfully said better than I possibly ever could in my whole and entire Life, believe that in another city you may have better luck finding people who TRULY understand you and Love You for WHO YOU REALLY ARE! I really like what the wise and wonderful @Serpentine Leaf has already wisely and wonderfully said better than I possibly ever could in my whole and entire Life: Find your Pond! Stay true to yourself and do what you can. Remember that there's ABSOLUTELY NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU! You are who you are and that's more than enough! If you need some help, perhaps you could try to buy some self-help books that may teach you how to socialize better, if you want. Having some social skills doesn't hurt in my opinion as long as you sstay true to yourself! I'd also suggest to see a Therapist since it does seem like you've been through A LOT fo Trauma and Pain and I am TRULY, DEEPLY SORRY FOR THAT! I hope things will improve soon for you one way or another! Keep looking for someone who may be right up your alley and if things don't work out, don't blame yourself. Keep looking as I am SURE that there is at least SOMEONE out there who is wondering how it is to be with a guy like you - Virgin or not! There's NO SHAME in that! Keep us updated and let us know how things work out for you! Keep writing here if it helps even just a little bit! Sending many safe, warm hugs to BOTH you, @LundiHvalursson, your Family, your Friends, your Mother, your Future Girlfriends, your Doctors, your Nurses, your Therapists and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!