I've read a number of your previous posts as well as this one. And so I have at least some small sense of how difficult this must be for you. Honestly, to my mind, this is not something you're going to find a solution for here on PC or anywhere else on the internet. I know you wrote you've been to many therapists & they haven't helped. But my personal, non-professional thinking is that professional mental health services may be what will be necessary for you to overcome your obsession.

I obviously don't know why none of the many therapists you've seen have been able to help you. However I'm not unfamiliar with this type of experience myself. (It's a long story & I'll spare you the details.) Perhaps though, if what you've tried has always been individual talk therapy with different therapists, maybe that's not the type of therapy you need? There's a particular type of therapy called Exposure Response Prevention (ERP) Therapy which is supposedly beneficial for OCD. Perhaps this is more the type of therapy that would be of help to you?

I believe I have replied to at least one of your previous posts. And I probably provided you with links to some articles, from PC's archives... (because that's what I do.) So it's possible I've brought these articles to your attention previously. If so, please forgive me. However here are links to 3 articles on the subject of ERP therapy:

ERP Therapy: A Good Choice for Treating OCD

Good Therapy for OCD

The Truth About ERP Therapy | OCD Reflections

My best wishes to you...