The meetup venue you are using is, I presume, Meetup.com? I never had good experiences with that one either. It's very much focused on extroverts. I started a group that no one showed up to, was part of another group where someone liked to question other people super aggressively, and another where some guy got very creepy with me.

Female virgins are likely to be those who are staying at home alone much of the time, as I did. I understand how embarrassing it can be, even though females don't face quite the same stigma as males in this case. One of the very few gender-based double-standards that we have the upper had on. But also remember there are women who are not virgins but have experienced bad relationships with men who have made sex feel dirty, degrading, or painful, or that sex was all she had to offer in a relationship. Your innocence will be appealing to a woman who has been hurt and used in this way.

Some scientists can be highly extroverted, and even world-class jerks. Those are the ones who attended that meetup. The introverted ones were probably in their rooms on their computers. A quieter venue like a lecture, forum, symposium, or the like might be a better option. There are also, counter-intuitive as it might seem, gatherings for people on the spectrum. Temple Grandin has spoken at some of these, and some other activists and public figures.

And never be afraid of being in a slim minority! That means different, not defective.