I want to be very concise:

I find the more social I am, the more depressed I become. Never am I lonelier than when I'm in a group. Things always start wonderfully, but eventually the bad thoughts come and tell me everyone actually hates me and the people's faces become cold.

I don't think I would call this "social anxiety", as I don't feel particularly anxious. Then again, perhaps this is the natural progression of social anxiety. My purpose in posting is to ask whether this is an experience others share?
They say being social is good for our mental health, but it triggers me.