nightdream, as much as you know that no one can make it better for you magically I want you to know that having understanding hearts holding you even in cyberspace is real. You are really not alone. I know it feels as though you are. I will reach out and hold you tight like my Jane used to for me. You are loved, there is love in this world. I wish you peace. I am so sincere as I write this. words fail me. Good luck night.