Quote:
Originally Posted by xRavenx
I had therapy today, and I am uncertain how I feel about this new therapist. It was only the second session. She is extremely structured and wants me to start a therapy journal where I don't just write down my thoughts, but do homework. She kept asking me to come up with positive thoughts, but she doesn't understand that it is hard to do that when all you are thinking is negative all the time and for a prolonged period of time. She also observed that my affect is very flat (which it is lately). She sits behind a big desk, rather than in a chair across from me. Usually in the beginning, I respond better to someone that listens more (initially) instead of being so quick to come up with "solutions" that aren't actually solutions for someone who is in an episode and is just starting therapy again for the first time in a long time. Just felt like letting this out. Not sure whether I should find a new T or give this one a chance. I know she means well and is trying to give me a push, but I just wish someone would listen and try to understand.
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xRavenx, I think your post above is full of very valuable points of discussion between you and your new therapist. I know it may seem a little scary to discuss some of what you wrote with her, but it is important. The worst that could happen is that she would say that you and she are not a good fit. The best thing is that she could be a bit more understanding and modify her approach a bit, that would be helpful for you. Getting such things out in the open can be liberating, even if they feel frightening to voice, at first.
If the worst is the case, then you would know it was time to look for a new therapist. The very worst situation, in my view, is wasting time with a therapist that cannot or will not help you.
I want to mention just a little thing based on what you wrote. I have never had a therapist sit behind a desk. I have had a couple therapists and psychiatrists sit at their desk, but not with the desk blocking my view of half of their bodies. I wouldn't like a person behind a desk, either. I remember years back that my psychiatrist would sit at his desk, though the desk wasn't in between us. He was in his office chair, and I was sitting in the uncomfortable wooden chair near it. One time, a couple years later, I told him that I hated the wooden chair and that I thought it was like a torture device. In response, he told me to sit anywhere I wanted in his office. He had many seating options, including a huge leather sofa. Well, I sat my butt right smack in the middle of that sofa, and he moved from his desk to a comfy looking chair that was just across from me. We've been sitting in these spots ever since. Happily!