Bookworm, don't let anyone, including your mother (who invalidated you) tell you how to feel.

While it's a term of endearment, especially among the older crowd, I have had people call me honey before, sweetheart, etc, and I feel like you. For me, it depends who its coming from. And MANY people do NOT like these terms used with them especially by strangers, I don't care how "Well meaning" they are.

But Bookworm, if you are uncomfortable, you are uncomfortable. There's no right or wrong about it. You have a right to ask him to stop. Because there's a saying "you don't know what you don't know." He probably has no idea he is making you uncomfortable. Unless you say something. It's hard to speak up for my own self, and I don't want to pressure you one way or the other to take action. this is just wisdom I know.

Edit: I have a neighbor who used to call me a pet name. I found it VERY patronizing and condescending. I ended up, after a while, finally, I got the courage to tell him I prefer he didn't use that pet name with me, and just call me by my name. I'm glad I did. He seems to have pulled away since then (I was completely nice when I told him, not a jerk). But I know that that's HIS issue, with whatever he is struggling with. He's still strange and hard to figure out.

Edit part 2: Oh, and people in the younger crowd use these words too! There are some women who work in the office of my apartment complex, and when I call with an issue, they used to call me "hon" or "honey." They're like in their 20s. It's the weirdest thing ever. I haven't said anything about that. I pick my battles because with that, it's not too bad. Also, my mechanic calls me "hon." He's married with kids and he seems kind of tough and I used to be a little intimidated by him so with that I also do not mind him calling me that.


But its PERSON PREFERENCE and COMFORT LEVEL. And everyone's is different no judgments either way.


Do what's comfortable for you. Honor how you feel and it's not wrong how you feel at all.