Quote:
Originally Posted by Fuzzybear
Thanks for your post. I particularly find the part about bullies interesting... it’s a common “truth” that they select “the weak” but I do not completely agree since most people I have known, including myself, are a more complicated mixture of “strong” and “weak”..
It is my belief, that bullies usually enjoy targeting those who have some gifts or qualities they Secretly Envy... and perhaps not only secretly, but unconsciously....perhaps they envy someone’s genuine care about others and empathy... their ability to form genuine human bonds despite their struggles... Although I realise not all bullies are like that. It is in itself a very complex issue. Why do people bully and why do some continue to bully.
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I can agree with all of that. Yes, it is complex. victims of bullies are actually in fact often infinitely stronger. The reasons the abuse occurs are also incredibly complex. Thank you for pointing out this important distinction. It is why I said the selection is due to their perception of weakness. Their perception does not define reality. Jealousy is a powerful motivator and I think your thoughts there are spot on in many cases.
I think the important part is knowing your strong qualities and renewing them no matter how many times a bully seeks to extinguish it. It is also important to disallow the behavior to continue.
You have many amazing qualities. Your instinct on the why in your case is much more apt to be accurate than mine.
