Celebrations and festivities have always been triggering.My care takers have taken these opportunities to impress family and friends.They would buy expensive gifts and provide too much food,too many choices for guests.Growing up in that home I internalized their abuse and thought I must be so bad because I don't even deserve food.I saw they didn't have any problem in overproviding for outsiders.I refused to eat during festivities thinking that my parents will be pleased that I am starving myself.