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Have Hope
You’re not babbling. I completely understand what you’re saying. I do feel better about myself for speaking up. I’ll get better at it as time goes on and I’ll get used to the discomfort of feeling like I’ve annoyed people or let them down.
I have done the same things as you... even forcing my boss to get things done like you did. Lol! Yes that’s why we get ourselves into trouble. We are too reliable and productive.
Start running up and down the halls my friend