Thank you all sooooooooooooooo very much!

I fell asleep in the midst of breaking down. Guess I needed the rest.

I deeply appreciate everyone's heartfelt and sincere replies to help. I appreciate it more than you all know. It helps to know that people care, even if we are strangers on the internet, it helps to know that I can reach out for help and receive caring replies. It helped!!!!

It is now Christmas morning, and I don't want to ruin anyone's Christmas day with my problems.

I think what happened is I got really triggered by my past abuse, surfacing because of my current work issues, and I got overwhelmed by it all. I'm pretty sure that's what happened, causing a meltdown.

@StreetcarBlanche, unfortunately, I cannot quit my job. I have financial responsibilities. I would lose my apartment, my car and I would have no place to live. It's not realistic but I thank you for your desire to help and for your sympathies!!

Today, I am going to try to not think about work issues that are bothering me. Today I will be with family members celebrating Christmas. My husband and I have a present to open together under our tree.

I am going to try to put all this aside for now and if I can.... at least for this morning.

A huge heartfelt THANK YOU again.