I googled her, she is the CMH center chief. That is not good, if she doesnt like me she may end up making my treatment impossible. And she is probably old. All old psychiatrists I met were nasty.

I do not want be locked up. I am not psychotic or manic, I do not need heavy meds. I do not want to be sedated. I have just cleaned the whole flat (my flatmate hasnt cleaned in months). I clean, study, work, go outside with the dog, .... Ba ba ba I do not do anything risky or spend money, actually I earn money by overworking myself when hyper (in summer I worked 110h in just a week at a festival, IDK how many hours I have worked this months while studying for my last 5 examns -I passed them all, and I got an scholarship and I begin my internship in two weeks bla bla bla)

Why do psychiatrist always want to sedate me?

The only nice psychiatrist I had told me he didn't want me to ever go IP or be on AP 😕 He helped me a lot. He said I can have very good insight and potential , just need support. I know my brain goes all wild and I start to feel nice and full of energy while wanting to die because I deserve it and death calls me sometimes too, but I have enough impulse control to think first, and I think I am starting to recognize this mood so I can take prazosin (it calms the agitation and paranoia which allows me to keep going and prevents me to do stupid things). Rigth now I feel exactly as two hours, two days and two weeks ago, but everything is undercontrol thanks to prazosin that helps me to deal with agitation.

I am going to walk the dog.