I am sorry you hurt today. Sorry about your breakup. That is so painful. But bpf1 is on the money. If you want to marry again, you will--I have no doubt. You just haven't found the right person yet. If you want this, you can and will make it happen for you. There are plenty of quality people who have been married multiple times who go on to remarry. You are far from the only one.
I also think you are being too hard on yourself. These illnesses we have to deal with make it hard for partners sometimes. That is just a fact. But that does not mean you cannot find one willing and able to be with you exactly as you are. That person is out there, if you so wish. Don't give up. Your life is not ruined, It is not over. You just need to be kind to yourself, push through this, an carry on with the goal you have set.