Always seems to happen around this time of year, but I've been thinking about a younger guy I used to work with. Will call him G.

We were more than colleagues, but never had a sexual relationship. Not only was he good-looking, but always helpful. Sometimes conversations were interrupted by the phone, with comments left hanging in the air. Called me one afternoon whilst on business trip in Germany and also on a day's leave walking his daughter round the park. We had some frank discussions about relationships, including extra-marital ones. He made it plain that he'd never do that to his wife. As for flirting, he didn't understand it. My response was "for someone like that, you're doing well!"

Then there was the time I was going on holiday with my now ex. On the day I flew, G told a female colleague that he was already missing me although the plane hadn't left the runway. A conversation ensued where he said some things that she never repeated. All she said to me was "you've got to talk". Then one day when we were in the office together, G and I talked about my holiday. I can't remember exactly what I said but his response was "that's because I've missed you". With that, he stood up and went for a walk. The chat didn't continue when he returned.

Devastated when he left the company, although we stayed in touch. Also said many times that he missed me. Sadly, we haven't seen each other for nearly five years. Has my phone number and e-mail address but haven't heard from him unless I instigate contact. So, will never know whether G fell in love with me or was indeed a "master flirter". We never kissed properly, just a strange brush of my cheek near to my mouth one Christmas. After that we resorted to hugs at suitable moments.

Anyone else had experiences like this when the shock has rendered you unable to ask someone just what the hell is going on?!