I completely agree with Mrs A. I don't judge you because I can understand just how intense these kinds of feelings can be and in your case they must be more so because your T has participated in the dynamic without drawing appropriate boundaries from the start. Sadly, it's extra painful for you to let go because he has been replying to you. I can see how it wouldn't be a long term solution to block him but if he blocked you that could hopefully allow you to move on because there's nothing more you can do. I hope that he is strong and responsible enough to do this for both of you.