Quote:
Originally Posted by divine1966
I find it interesting that you have issues with what she was doing in high school and issue with what she posts online and issue with her not seeing a psychologist and some other stuff etc etc Is there some type of control that you want over her?
Or is it that she just isn’t a good match?
I encourage you to date people whom you accept without wanting to change them.
After only few months of dating you are bothered by so many things. Why date someone whom you want to change? She is an adult and she is who she is.
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I'm not bothered that she isnt seeing a psychologist. I'm understanding of her not wanting to see a psychologist because I know she might be worried about the process. It can be overwhelming to open up ur feelings to someone new.
I haven't even looked at her Facebook page because she told me that it has a lot of pictures of her ex's and I know that's going to bother me. I'm just asking if it bothers anyone else and if it doesnt, then why would it bother me?
Its definitely not a control thing because I would never tell someone to do what they didnt want to do. I would ask them, but would never make them do something. I'm more of a supporter type person in relationships. I encourage my gf to grow as a person as well as me. I also make sure that I'm not pushing them to much, it's like finding a good middle ground.
Personally, I would never bring an ex into my new relationship even if we ended well, which most of mine have. I also think that contacting old ex's is very strange to do, especially after many years have gone by. I would probably think that that person was contacting them to see if there life is better or there ex's or some kind of unconcious gain for urself? Idk. I just find it a bit weird.
Personally, I am having feelings of maybe this isnt the best person for me? It's a bit confusing to me. I really like her because she tries so hard to be a better person for herself and her work ethics is really good and so far her money saving skills are really good, she is great with kids as well. There are a few things that bother me though. She had depression, and I'm not sure if shes working on it for me or if shes working on it for herself (which I would want her to work on it for herself, not for me). Her emotional level (niceness?) seems to be only there in situations where it's easy. Idk how to really explain it. I guess I could say that if I came home after a long days work, or back hurting, or a broken foot, I would still treat everyone nicely and want to hear about there day and just let them know that I am in pain and that's why I might be a little irritable. But with her, she would just say things like, "do you like the sound of ur own voice?" Instead of saying that she has a headache. Which I find a bit strange that she couldnt say she had a headache....