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I'm going to second what Winter4me said, if your mother gas some form of dementia we are talking neurological problems, not behavioral. She can't retain new info. She's likely unable to do some of things you are frustrated about.
When is the last time your mother had a complete physical? There are so many medical problems that can cause the symptoms you are describing. It would help to know the underlying cause.
If your mother is no longer able to tend to her finances you or you sister may have to take over her bill paying. Someone mentioned a power of attorney. If she doesn't have one it would be good to have one in place.
My mom had Alzheimers. It was tough, emotionally and physically. It must be even harder trying to deal with it from a distance
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