Marriage is a contract of love and commitment between two people. To me, that means not fantasizing sexually about other women all the time. But that's just me and what I think. I don't think you should be getting married. It really seems you need professional help. You're downplaying the 20 times you've cheated. Someone in love in a committed relationship does not cheat 20 times, nor with escorts. You're not being honest with yourself. Why go through with a marriage? What do you see coming out of this that is positive? Does your fiance expect 100% commitment? I really do not understand your reasoning for getting engaged, let alone married. Why not just choose to be single, so that you can do as you please, and with whomever you please? If my husband told me he fantasized about sex with strangers, I would divorce him in a heartbeat. And if I found out he cheated before we got married? It would be over in a heartbeat. You're not thinking of her in this equation. Like I said before, you want both.. you want your cake and to eat it too, and that's really not fair in a marriage. True love means putting the other person first sometimes. You're really just thinking of yourself and what you want, not of her and what she may want.