Thanks everyone.

Psychris - I definitely don't look at it as a vacation..LOL
I am only thinking of it as a way to get help in, like you say, managing my meds, making sure I don't do anything stupid and helping with the intrusive thoughts.

It is getting so hard and I am at the point where I have no idea what I am going to do. I just don't feel like I am able to deal with *me* and that is why I am thinking about it.
Probably won't go, though. I don't like people worrying about me and I don't like when people think bad of me and I know if I were to go to hospital they would think bad of me.