I'm sorry you haven't found the advice/support you were hoping for.

My own response to your thread and probably that of others was your seeming lack of caring about how this would affect your potential wife.

I read how for you "it was only a piece of paper". That is an honest feeling. However, there is no mention that your potential wife feels the same way. Just you. You don't even have the testicular fortitude to tell her. You "think" she knows. Huh?

I wish you the very best, but do hope you can find a solution where *both* of you find happiness.