Lately....I am NOT okay. I did finally sort-of tell my husband what's going on. I basically said "I think I'm getting depressed again" but I didn't really elaborate.

He is....ok how do I put this nicely....he's not very educated. He just doesn't "get" things sometimes. He won't read books. He barely graduated high school, he's 37 years old and still works at a grocery store...and no, he's not in management.

So how do I get him to understand what's really going on?

And how do I get him to pitch in and help a little without me begging so hard just for anything?

Last night, for example. I worked from 6:30 AM - 6:30 PM. On the way home, I called him - basically to ask if I should pick up something from a drive-thru for dinner. I just didn't have time to talk, I was driving, I was exhausted, I just wanted a YES or NO answer from him. He said "oh, get what you want, I don't care..." yadda yadda no decision at all.

I get home and I had to nuke dinner for all of us.

I just really wanted him to just MAKE DINNER or MAKE A DECISION so I didn't have to. I am so exhausted. I spend my entire day at work, and any breaks I have, I spend the entire break time calling every psych and doctor in town trying to get a f'ing appointment. That alone has been hell.

I just want him to HELP but any time I ask him to do something, it just turns into him asking me a million questions of how I want it done!! I just want him to DO IT without me HELPING him. I don't have the time, I don't have the energy.

And then...even after I was clearly NOT okay...he still keeps bugging me with questions about the new house. Even after I CLEARLY told him that I DO NOT WANT TO WORK ON THE HOUSE STUFF UNTIL AFTER NEXT WEEK. But he still kept talking about it. I don't understand him. How clear do I have to be for him to listen??

He thinks this "depression thing" is just temporary. That oh, when work settles down, I'll be okay. He thinks he can just crack funny jokes and try and make me laugh as if that will make it all better. Well it doesn't. How do I get him to understand that.