So, we saw both specialists. The one yesterday was young (only 30)...I am not discriminating...in fact, her age is the reason I narrowed the choices to include her as my son really connected to his speech therapist a few years ago who was around her age. I only bring it up to say that she doesn’t have much experience. And unfortunately, I could tell. I didn’t connect with her. I know it’s about him but I felt I needed to connect on some level as well and on top of that, he left more afraid of some things than when he went in. For instance, she drilled him about whether or not he was “safe”. He’s 9. He left obsessing about it and worried about whether or not he planned to do something when he clearly did not. I think that was more for her to figure out. The therapist we saw today was absolutely amazing. My son opened up to her more than he ever even had to me...telling her how he planned to hurt us and also explaining that he hears “buzzing” noises inside his head when she was asking if he hears voices , etc. My husband prefers her as well. The best part is she does play therapy (among other things such as EMDR) and took him to her play room to play with her Thomas trains so he adores her as well. The only thing is I have several questions for her. I didn’t ask them Because I didn’t want to ask in front of him for fear of scaring him like he was scared yesterday. I am going to call her tomorrow. He is scheduled to see her again next week.
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*****
Every finger in the room is pointing at me
I want to spit in their faces then I get afraid of what that could bring
I got a bowling ball in my stomach I got a desert in my mouth
Figures that my courage would choose to sell out now
Tori Amos ~ Crucify
Dx: Schizoaffective Disorder
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