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sarahsweets · Jan 15, 2020, 07:59 AM

Hey @FridayT:

Quote:

Originally Posted by FridayT

My husband and I moved to arizona from Seattle with the help of my parents. We're staying with them under their good grace, but here are the problems.

He is complaining almost nonstop about noise and my family, saying it's worse than the problems in Seattle and wants to go back once he saved up.

My FIL had a saying that I agree with, especially when my husband and I fell on hard times. "There's not enough room for two families under one roof"
I agree with this. Even if your parents were wonderful and he didnt want to move back to Seattle I think its hard to live under the roof of another family, parents as well.

Quote:

I have no intention of going back, especially because it's been so bad for us in Seattle and there's nothing there for us.

What kind of conversations did you have before moving? Was he on board? Did he bring up these concerns or feelings about staying? Did he have any issues with moving?

Quote:

He had always been complaining. His own apartment was too noisy, my apartment was too noisy and more. Im fed up and I'm done.

I've tried so hard for so many years and nothing is ever good enough.

To add insult to injury, he claim that my family and I "abducted" him, giving him no say in the move. He had his say, but his ideas were to stay in Seattle, in the same stressful and dangerous situation.

So if he wanted to stay in Seattle and you did not how did you go about making the decision to move? I know he wasnt abducted but it sounds like he was making his feelings clear. I am not sure why he would have moved if he was so against it but maybe he felt pressure?

Quote:

Let's not also forget that he makes it all about him, considers none of my feelings or efforts, always treats me like I'm the bad guy. He is also a walking talking contradiction! "I don't want absolute quietness!" "It's too noisy!" "It's always about you" "Oh I am not being heard!" And so on.

I wouldnt say its all about you, it takes two to tango but it does sound like his feelings were made known and he either felt bullied, or resigned or even gone along with it and regretted it.

Quote:

I've been burnt out and I couldn't do anything to save money or get anywhere. Im at my breaking point and I wouldn't be sad if we're divorced.

I should never met him, or gone to Seattle.

Did you move in with your parents due to financial issues that you would have had no matter where you lived? Or is it specifically Seattle? I have heard that its expensive to live there.