I remember how stressful school was and having to worry about tuituon and fees. The mind can blank out a bit when you're under that much pressure.

In application essays, they are always looking for you to name an achievement other than financial gain or good grades. Maybe something along the lines of describing academic success as developing specific skills that would benefit society or communities. It will probably help to mention personal growth and areas you want to improve on because that sounds both humble and aspirational.

Good luck. You sound reslly stressed so maybe a little break will help you think better.