Too much time passed since I saw my dad. He called me the other day, which he almost never does anymore. I promised I would visit, but I dreaded having to go. What I did was to email my sister and ask if she was going to visit him, and if I could meet her there. It's far less painful and stressful that way. Even so, I had a lot of anxiety. Luckily, she suggested this afternoon, so I jumped on it to get it over with.

My dad hardly said anything, so my sister and I were talking. Five times, my dad stood up and walked out of the room without saying anything. [Not angrily, more like a person with dementia.] Finally I asked him why he was doing that and he stated he wasn't interested in the conversations. I said "Well, you can start one you like or ask us questions." [As if he'd ever do the latter.]

"I have no questions", he said.

It's not like my sister and I didn't include him or bring up topics he used to be interested in. We talked about birds, at length. History he used to be interested in. But despite that, he still got up and walked out of the room. Truth is, he can't concentrate, and has had difficulty throughout his life. Or, he talks at you, but not with you and if it isn't all about him, then there's nothing of interest.

When he was still home, he often stood up and left even 15 minutes after I'd arrive from a 38 minute drive. He didn't exactly invite me along, especially after he knew I disapproved of his drinking. Now at the assisted living, there is no bar to go to, but he does the same and chats with other residents. In a month he will likely return home. We all kind of dread that.

Dad suddenly wants to buy a new car. We don't even think he should drive anymore. He doesn't have a clue how much money he has. He thinks he's rich and has gone around telling everyone in town he is, for years, so people ask him for money. He's not poor, but could be if his spending is uncontrolled.

He's had some tests that indicated cognitive issues, and others where they said he was just fine. They're still just giving him antidepressants. His depression has lifted, and physically he looks much much better, but he's not right. I can't diagnose him with bipolar disorder. My siblings and I have told about 8 doctors to consider it, though. Whatever!