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Buffy01 · Jan 26, 2020 at 01:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Memories of Silence

There are some good ideas in this thread, so I will try those.

Others I can think of:

☆ Remember nice things people have said about you. If you have heard the same things about yourself by more than one person, it is likely that it is how you come across and that’s other people see it as well, and it is true rather than something they have told you just to make you feel better.

☆ Think of people who are widely hated, such as murderers or other criminals. Remind yourself that anything you do “wrong” won’t be anywhere near as bad as what they did.

☆ Try to get better at your hobbies and interests and improve as much as you can on at least one thing.

☆ When you are around strangers, ask yourself if you notice their flaws and if you’re judging them. You should find that you’re not paying them any (or much) attention, and that you’re seeing them as a whole picture instead of in the small details you view yourself with. You’re not noticing if their hair is messy, if they’re wearing odd earrings, if they lost a button from their shirt or if they have a big nose. Why would people notice these types of things about you?

☆ Start a folder on your computer (or email news articles to yourself) about people who do rude or disrespectful things. Celebrities can be helpful with this, as their actions are always making the news. Maybe a prince didn’t apologise for a car accident or a singer copied someone else’s work. If you are a member of a Facebook group where people complain about businesses or people’s behaviour, that will also be helpful. Remind yourself you’re not like these people, and therefore, no one has a reason to be annoyed with you and strangers have no reason to dislike you for your actions.

☆ Try to learn more social skills. YouTube can help with this. There may be unwritten social rules and expectations you were never aware of because no one thought you teach them to you or you forgot them.

☆ Be open and try new things, even if you think you might not like them. Even just by trying a different movie or music genre, you’re possibly going to expand your interests which will help to make you a more interesting person.

☆ Always wear clothes you like. If you like what you’re wearing, you’ll feel better about yourself.

☆ Always get dressed, make sure your hair is nice and your nails are groomed/manicured. If you are a woman, wear makeup everyday, even when you don’t leave the house. You’ll never have self esteem if you’re in your pyjamas with no makeup and dirty, frizzy hair. You’ll feel much better if you put effort into your appearance, which you’re doing for you.

That is great advice. I will keep that in mind. Thank you for reminding me.