Quote:
Originally Posted by Have Hope
I'm sorry you're so discouraged. Your feelings are perfectly understandable and justified.
Unfortunately, there's only so much you can say and do. If you've discussed it many times, yet he continues to hold on, it's his choice, and his life.
This is where a mother needs to learn to let go and allow their child to live their own mistakes.
It's MOST painful to watch and to experience, but it is his mistake to continue accepting this toxic behavior from her, and he will have to learn the lesson himself, until he's finally had enough.
Only by making mistakes ourselves -- and living with that mistake -- do we truly learn and grow.
If he were to want to marry her, then I'd say it's your place and your right to speak up again and to speak your mind again. Hopefully, that would never happen, but right now it's probably best to sit back and just accept it for what it is.
Hopefully one day he will see the light and will let go. That's all you can do at this point is hope.
Hugs to you.
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first of all, thank you for your kind words.
as far as marriage goes, it's funny you brought that up. with all that she is up to, with all of the grief she brings to him, with all of the NOT spending quality time with him and disappearing for hours/days, she STILL complains that they are not married yet and cannot understand why (according to what my son just told me the other night)
he never has wanted to, and from what he says, never will marry her. i have heard this from him many, many, times. makes a person wonder then, exactly why is he staying? he did make a comment that he was afraid that if she ever did leave, she would not let him see his daughter. "because that is the type of person she is" is what he said. that is when i told him i didn't think he would have any problem gaining custody considering her troubled background.