Yes I understand exactly what you mean, and thanks again for your insights.

Some people simply find that release through pain. I don't just wale on them recklessly, I consider it to be an honor, where I inflict just enough pain to get their attention, then I back off and resort to more sensual play. What I do is serious business for the people involved.

As for the movies and the books, I have not read nor seen them but I will say this, sex is much more likely to take place when the Dom is male and the submissive is female, but each dynamic is different every time. Never have I done it the same way twice. I have a huge assortment of 'toys' or implements that can generate a multitude of sensations. I love shopping at "Domme Depot". Lol!