Yeah, I know there are avenues I could take that would allow me to utilize this "skill" with fewer repercussions, and I make an effort to stick to those paths.

But that isn't what I'm asking. What I want to know is how this sort of behavior affects the average person. Obviously, engaging in this manner doesn't bother me and never has, so I don't really understand how it affects other people. In the past, when I completely "removed the mask," so to speak, I was a bit surprised to find out how damaging it actually was. Initially, I blamed other people for being too sensitive (which one might call gaslighting). But it kept happening, and I think I'm self-aware enough now to admit that maybe it isn't everyone else around me who's wrong.

I've heard that. It's a sort of dynamic that can turn toxic real quick though.

Both. I try to stick to the former, but the former can easily lead into the latter, and I don't always have the sensitivity to know when to back off.

Right, I found myself in this position as well. To be honest, after I got over the initial shock of it, I didn't mind it that much. I'd still like to know when it's happening, though. It's one thing to deliberately craft a thorny personality so that people keep their distance. It's quite another drive people away inadvertently because one can't control one's own belligerence.

Cool. So what would be the best way of finding out who's down for some combative discussion? Or better, what's a good way to tell if someone isn't down for it before any feelings get hurt?

This is what I'm trying to avoid. Being that one asshole who argues with customer service reps because they don't have a way out without losing their jobs.