The words of my new psychiatrist.

Wonderful.
Not.

First day meeting him and that was his response. So helpful huh? Well I don't really know why I am posting on here but I felt like I should tell someone, other than those I tell on a daily basis. But I quit. I will not eat, and if forced, it will not be staying in my body. I hate life so much right now. SO MUCH. I can't find happiness in anything, and the more I try and be positive and try to recover, all I do is gain weight. I can't be fat. I just can't be. This is coming off a bit harsh, but...I'm so done with my life, my eating disorder, my everything. Its been such a loong journey. I'm only 19. A 19 year old who has suffered for about 14 years.

My life is dull. I am lonesome. Nothing will change.