First, alcohol is alcohol, doesn't matter if it's in hard liquor, beer or wine. My father drank hard liquor and tried to dumb down with wine and he would say that he read wine was good for you, but NOT the way he drank it.

The other thing I want to point out to you that's VERY important is that what you and your wife have, this challenge with alcohol WILL most definitely affect your children. I AM a child of a father who was a binge alcoholic, and it affected me in ways I had not realized and I ended up marrying a man who also was a binge alcoholic. This was back when there really was not a lot understood about binge alcoholism. What you and your wife are creating that you are not seeing is CODEPENDENT prone children.

I have sat at Alanon meetings horrified by learning how parents with these challenges were dealing with children that WERE A MESS and listening to their challenges horrifed me. The other thing you have to be aware of in this picture is that a person can be genetically prone to alcoholism too. So both you AND your wife can have challenges with your children down the road that are going to be so very hard on you. Not only do you both have a problem, but your children WILL have abandonment issues because you are both living in that bottle and neither of you are really THERE for THEM.

This disease of alcoholism is hard on everyone who loves someone who is all about that disease.