Many insightful posts here, @LilyMop! I do agree that it may be due to self-preservation - in both cases, they don't want other people to bring their mood down. If you feel bad, they may feel bad too. If you feel good, they may feel bad by comparison. It's hard! I think it's best to avoid the kind of people who do this too much and perhaps avoid sharing too much information to this kind of people. That is just my opinion, though. Sending many safe, warm hugs to BOTH you, @LilyMop, your Family, your Friends and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!