Quote:
Originally Posted by BadNews4321
Well these are some weird recent conversations. Maybe on the outside I look well and have become an expert at masking symptoms for close to 20 years after being diagnosed. I feel I've gained a lot of empathy from realizing how in the past my mood disorder affected others. I was very hard on myself, unforgiving of some things I did, and hated who I was.
There are a lot of days where the smallest things irritate me from being very mentally fatigued or everything around me seems too slow and inefficient, that I want to punt something across the neighbourhood. It take a lot of focus to be patient and look like I'm normal in those moments.
I don't believe anyone who is telling me I could be misdiagnosed has any ill intentions, but at the same time, it does feel disrespectful to all the work I am doing to stay as healthy as possible. I don't know how to respond or even if I should.
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You're finding a way to thrive despite your diagnosis. That's remarkable. Others who have not experienced mental illness may struggle with proper empathy because for most, the only way to truly know what this is like is to live it. Also, how can they understand if you're working so hard to mask your feelings? Most people aren't super skilled with empathy for truly hidden emotion.
Maybe try to see their comments as misunderstood compliments that your incredible work is delivering the results that you hope for. Also, there's nothing at all wrong with being honest with someone and letting them know how things truly feel on the inside. You don't have to wear a mask for anyone. You're doing the work to stay balanced overall. There is no shame in letting others see that you swing back and forth from time to time and you overcome it. That simply shows strength in the face of a challenge and that is beautiful for others to see and feel. Their empathy can improve as a result.