I gave up on trying to read my book and returned it to the library today. I just don't have that ability to focus/attention span when stable let alone during an episode. I took another Ativan this morning, but it's wearing off and I'm getting super agitated again. Trying to calm down by listening to music and drinking herbal tea. I'm trying to not let the fact that I can't even read a ****ing book on my favorite subject upset me, but that's not going well. The risperdal/ativan combo doesn't even help me sleep that much. It's better than nothing though.

I'm thinking about going back to group today since I have nothing else to do, but I doubt anyone there will be of much help.