HI to all, and hugs to those who need one. This week I have almost finished all my organising/errands that I wanted to get done before university begins in 10 days. The only things left are potting some plants and cleaning my flat. I have to go slow to avoid making the Fibromyalgia worse. Thankfully, this week it has slowly improved. I have been going for gentle swims in the ocean regularly. I do crash a little after, but my recovery time is improving. My hip injury from a year ago is still giving me grief. Just when I think it's over something triggers it and it flares up again. These physical limitations frustrate me endlessly, and sometimes lead me into despair.

Today I am feeling good mentally. The anxiety that was plaguing me has finally eased so I can now begin tapering down my clonazepam dose. The weather has been hot this week so my tiny little flat without air-conditioning is beginning to warm up. Even the nights are hot so I can't even open the windows then to cool the place down. At least I have fans to keep me cool enough. On Wednesday I saw my T and we had a great chat. The session went 20 minutes over. I hadn't realised the time and my T seemed to be enjoying the discussion. We were talking about my diagnosis, my physical illnesses, and how I think I will go adding 20 hours a week of study to my load. He initially thought I was getting hypomanic as I was talking faster, and changing topics, but I explained I was just happy to be feeling a little better and saw no other symptoms (outside some insomnia) that would indicate hypomania. My mind is running at a normal pace. I think the previous month I have been so fatigued I spoke slowly, and sparingly with my T so now I feel a bit better I am back to normal speech patterns. He ended up agreeing that I am still stable.

Due to being so exhausted this last month(Fibromyalgia) I have not been out much, or caught up with people. I am getting lonely so I have tried to set up catch up with a few people but they say they want to then don't get back to me. Life gets in the way I guess. This weekend I am going to finally catch up with my partner who I haven't seen in 10 days due to him and I being unwell. Fibromyalgia steals so much from me. This massive flare-up seemed to be caused by the severe PTSD I had last year. All that adrenaline and stress finally made me physically ill again. Now I have little stress in my life, eat well, meditate, and do other things to keep me calm and get me strong, I have hope that my body will recover. At least to a degree where I can look for casual work and do well in my studies. The mental fight against despair is constant but I refuse to give in. It has been a long battle to get stable mentally. I am tired from it, but I WON! Now I just need the physical to follow suit and I will be the happiest I have ever been while stable.